Affairs happen every day. Sometimes people get away with it and sometimes they don’t. Whichever way it goes, the person involved in the affair usually feels some remorse and guilt for cheating on his spouse. He also lives in a constant fear of his infidelities being revealed and the consequences that may result. He is very well aware that he is risking the future of his family, his profession, his reputation and his life when he continues in this manner.
Very often, when an affair is found out by the spouse, it can cause unimaginable shock and disappointment. Even when some spouses suspect their partner’s infidelity, it is usually denied until it is finally revealed. No one likes to believe that they are being cheated on, and no cheater wants anyone to know about his deceit. The revealing of an extramarital affair can be devastating to everyone involved. Here are some major consequences of having an extramarital affair.
1. Emotional Trauma
When an extramarital affair is revealed, both spouses are left to deal with the emotional trauma and bad memories. This is so even if the partner is forgiven by his spouse. Emotional distress is rampant in this situation. Occasionally the affected spouse might feel angry and unhappy. Eventually the blame game comes in and they may not feel the same way emotionally towards each other.
2. Loss of trust
If you are discovered to be a cheater, you may not be trusted again. This is a heavy price to pay. Many persons believe that once you cheat, you will never stop. If you are caught in the act, be prepared to have your spouse not being able to trust you anymore.
3. Character defamation
A disclosed affair can do great damage to your character and reputation that you have worked so hard to build for many years. Not only will your spouse be disappointed, but you will be looked down at by members of your community, members of your church, your co-workers and so on. Depending on your social status, these implications can be truly devastating for you.
4. Loss of job
While your personal life should not necessarily affect your job, there are some professions that can be affected by personal affairs. If you are a minister of the state, a minister of religion or a school principal, an extramarital affair that has been revealed can be detrimental to your career. If you are in a sensitive profession, prepare to be released from your duties or resign.
5. Separation and divorce
These are among the most frequent actions taken for infidelity. Many persons opt to get a divorce when they believe that things are just not going to work out in the marriage. A divorce can be devastating financially, emotionally and socially. It can have a negative impact on the spouse, leaving him/her as an emotional wreck.
6. Financial consequences
The cheating spouse may have to deal with legal fees and other financial obligations. He might also have taken a significant amount of funds from the family account to finance his affair. This type of behavior can leave a family in total bankruptcy. Unfortunately, the whole family has to suffer from the financial loss of the affair.
7. The children
Children see an affair as a betrayal of their trust for the cheating parent. There are times when children become confused and are negatively affected because of the affair. They will sometimes blame themselves for the problem at hand. Furthermore, children can get caught in the middle of a nasty custody feud between both parents. This is totally unfair to the innocent ones. The knowledge of an affair can jeopardize the future and well being of your child.
8. Can be sued for sexually transmitted diseases
This is an extramarital consequence that is frequently overlooked. Many persons venture outside their marriages, having sex with infected persons and passing on the disease to their spouses. Many are not prepared to get tested for fear that they have contracted some serious STD. Numerous spouses have been hurt by infections brought home by their partners. When an affair is uncovered the affected spouse can decide to get tested for STDs. If he or she comes back with positive results, the cheating partner can be sued for damages and discomfort caused by those diseases. The legal and financial implications can be hefty in this case.
An extramarital affair that has been revealed can cause instability and destruction to a family. While there may be various reasons for cheating, it is usually done with utter disregard for the other partner. It is important that before you ever cheat on your partner, you assess the consequences and seek counseling for underlying marital problems.