There are many potential fallouts of an affair that one never considered before delving into the situation. One can face wide-scale embarrassment, loss of family trust, degradation of character among other things. The consequences are never really considered when enjoying the moment of the affair. Cheaters think they are too clever to be caught. They believe that their spouses are less smart themselves and they could never figure out what’s going on. Yeah, we all like to think that way, but sometimes spouses are way ahead of the game; they may know what’s going on and play along in the deceit until it all comes to an end. The feelings of being found out are much worse that one could ever imagine. It’s dreadfully surreal. The implications are far fetched and the damage is toxic to the rest of your life. Unexpected fallouts can tarnish your reputation forever, destroying your purity and leave you with a scared emotion for life. Here are some lifelong scars of damage that an exposed affair can bring.
1. Damage to your self-image, spiritual and mental health
Provided that you are not an unfeeling person, an act of deceit and unfaithfulness can be punishing to both you and your spouse. The thought of your infidelity can disrupt your spirit, making you wake up wondering what you have done to your lovely home. As a result of cheating, you could suffer from depression, low self-esteem and most of all the feeling of guilt.
2. Family relations, job and social implications
Many persons who are found out to be cheaters face ostracism from those close to them like friends, extended family, co-workers and neighbors. Everyone will have something to whisper about and rumors to spread. For the moment of the fallout, there will be no peace of mind. Expect to hear judgments and remarks from people who you don’t even know.
The possibility exists where in-laws or even your spouse could try to make trouble for you at work. Nothing could be more annoying than having people jabber and whisper about you at your workplace. Some people quit their jobs to avoid the humiliation and the criticism. This can totally derail your future career possibilities and cause you to lose a lot of money.
In an unfortunate turn, news of your extramarital affair could spread to your children’s school. They in turn can be affected by the discussions of your personal affairs by parents and teachers alike. Sometimes affairs can affect the mental and emotional well being of your children. Chances are, your kids might resent you later on for ruining their childhood.
3. A divorce could ruin your prized assets and financial stability
While there are professional implications to deal with, there could also be larger financial problems. You will have to consider the possibility of dividing your money and assets and pay spousal and child support. If you have children, prepare to have your ex-wife or husband be involved in your life’s affairs after the divorce. These could include keeping up with the holidays, caring for the kids, family reunions and all the other responsibilities that come with family life for as long as you live. Living your life with two sets of financial, social and family obligations can set you back a great deal or destroy you financially.
4. If you become single, you have a less ‘marketable’ reputation
You will certainly be considered damaged goods after leaving behind your wife, family and lover. It would be difficult to start over and find someone new with great qualities in a potential mate. No one would want to be with someone who has encountered so much social, mental and emotional suffering. This is the truth. If you disclose your past honestly, you will probably be rejected by your new mate. They may feel that you are carrying around too much strain or they might find it difficult to trust you. Your new mate certainly would not want to go through what you’ve brought your family through. Neither will they want to contend with exes and resentful children. Furthermore, depending on how nasty the effect of the resolution was, being with you in some cases would mar your new lover’s integrity as well.
Being an adulterer does not make it impossible for you to find new love and new beginnings. Many have moved on and are doing well for themselves and their new families. The problem is that it might be a bit more difficult for you. If your new partner knows about your past, they might become very watchful of you. They will not trust you and as we all know, trust plays an integral part in building a successful relationship.
All being said, a disclosed affair can deface your reputation, hurt your family and can cause humiliation and resentment. Even if you are forgiven by your spouse and you both have reconciled, the possibility of separation still looms ahead. You will have to put twice the effort in your family life to prove that you can be trusted again.
On a final note, an affair that is not managed with considerable scrutiny is a bad idea. In fact, deception on a whole is harmful to your own peace of mind. It is always best for you to seek counseling for marital problems or get out of the relationship gracefully.